I pinch my nose. “Hopper? Did you try to bribe a federal agent with a blowjob?”
“Bribe? No.” Hopper looks at me like I’m the crazy one for suggesting it. “He was getting his morning coffee, and I paid for it. He pretends to hate it when I do that.” Hopper chuckles fondly.
Not gonna lie—when Hopper laughs like that, all self-amused and giddy, it makes the hair stand up on the back of my neck.
“I asked him if he'd prefer something stronger than coffee. That's when I offered him the blowjob. Which he politely declined.” Hopper looks a little disappointed but shrugs. “No means no.”
“You do know that sentiment also holds true about buying him coffee.”
Hopper holds up his finger. “True, but he's never hesitated to take coffee from me. I’d say he almost looks forward to it.”
Luca straightens Hopper’s collar. “Please don't make me have to kill him, Hop. I'm sure he's a man with a family, and I don't want his kids to grow up without a dad.”
Hopper shakes his head. “No kids, no family. Pretty sure he's gay.”
Narrowing his eyes, Luca asks, “And how would you know that?”
Hopper snickers to himself. Digging into his pocket, he pulls up his phone. “Found his Grindr account. It’s under a fake name, but I’d know those hands anywhere.”
He eagerly brings up said account and bites his lip as he scrolls through the pictures. I’ll give the man this—he’s hiding a nice body under those cheap suits. And…yep. That's his dick, uncut, which I know Hopper likes.
Don’t ask me how I know.
“Looks like he's vers,” I comment.
Luca smacks my arm. “Do not encourage this.”
I shrug. “I'm just saying. Hopper likes to switch it up.”
Again, please—for the love of God—please don’t ask.
Luca shakes his head. “It doesn't matter what either of them prefers because Hopper here is going to stay the fuck away from him, aren't you?”
Hopper shrugs. “The question isn't whether or not I can stay away from him, but whether or not he can stay away from me.”
“He's not hitting on you, Hopper,” I say, grabbing his shoulder. “He's trying to build a case against you. He’s literally doing his job.”
Hopper laughs loud enough for the rest of the group to look over at us. He waves me off. “Good one, Anthony. You're funny.”
I let out a sigh. “Hop, you know I love you like a brother, right?”
He rolls his eyes. “Duh.”
“And you know how I don’t break the law, right?”
He snickers again. “Literally the first Mafia consigliere who’s never been arrested.”
I glare at Luca, who sends a small prayer heavenward and crosses himself. “Hopper.”
Hopper looks to Luca, blinking innocently. “Yes?”
“Remember how Anthony likes to keep that hush-hush?”
He grimaces at me. “Shit. Sorry. But I think only Mads heard me.”
Fuck.
I spin around, and Mads is standing right behind me, his eyebrows buried in his hairline. “Uh. No, I didn’t. I didn’t hear anything.” He stretches his arms out dramatically and executes the worst fake yawn I’ve ever seen. “I was just letting Edgerton know I’m ready to go when he is.”