Dani blinked back tears. For someone who wasn’t prone to eye
leakage, she was sure having a hard time, but maybe that was
okay. It was okay to feel things. To let other people in. To let
both happy and sad tears fall. “I’ve lived alone for a long time.
I thought I wanted to do that to keep myself safe. I had to live
like that for so long, and it just became a habit. I had to be
tough.”
“I understand.”
Dani reached up and smoothed back the golden strands of
Emily’s hair. She leaned into her touch and never lost that
wonderful, beautiful smile. Dani had come to think of it as
Emily’s signature look. She found that humorous, an inside
joke almost.
“It felt good, having you here. It was different, but I
couldn’t make myself pretend that I didn’t enjoy it, even at the
beginning. I always thought of you as sunshine. Sunshine in
my dark. I missed you, even when you were gone tonight. I
did all this thinking. Okay, I’ve thought about this for a lot
longer than when you were gone. I’ve been honestly thinking
about it since your dad approached me. I had to face the truth
for myself. I know this started out fake, but it’s real for me.
That’s the truth. That scares me, so I know it’s real. I’ve
wanted to put my past behind me for so long, but somehow, I
ended up letting it define me anyway. I’m so tired of living
with so many yesterdays and this giant collection of my past
hurts and fears.
“Everyone always says it’s only right now that counts. I’ve
been trying hard not to feel anything, but you make that
impossible. I was so afraid to make any moment count,
because then it’s something that can be taken away. Now that