Chapter Twelve
Saylor
The following morning was a storm of activity. In the short time they’d stayed, Dani and Casey had managed to spread their belongings throughout the house and were gathering up bits and pieces and shouting about things they’d misplaced. Or not packed in the first place.
Hunter was permanently connected to his work environment, even when he joined us in the kitchen for breakfast. I let him be. The previous night he’d broken into his work to satisfy my itch and my need to reconnect with him. I didn’t want to appear needy, and with the girls staying at the Paradise Valley Boutique Hotel and Spa tonight, I’d have Hunter again to myself.
I took him a mug of coffee and when he looked at me with a gaze that burned, I knew it wasn’t business he had on his mind. When I couldn’t stand it any longer, I turned away and caught Casey fanning herself.
“Damn, it’s hot in here,” she said. “Did someone adjust the heating?”
Hunter took his coffee and left the kitchen.
“Shit. Something I said?” Casey asked.
“Not at all,” I said quickly, wondering who I was defending. “Something’s come up with his work and he needs to sort it out.”
“Okay, because the way he looks at you is a bit um-wow, if you know what I mean. Are you sure you want to go through with this marrying yourself thing?”
“Of course I do,” I replied, again too quick, as if I didn’t want to think deeply about my decision.
“Good,” said Dani, “because today, at the Paradise Valley Spa, we’re doing the full bridal experience. Body scrubs, hot stones, deep massage, light massage, oils, nails, feet, elbows, chocolate and champagne.”
My phone beeped a message and I felt a burst of anxiety when the first person who came to mind was Rex.
— You all need to be ready to leave in 20 —
Hunter. He was driving us over to Paradise Valley for our spa day.
I laughed. Nerves, I suppose. “That’s the chauffeur,” I announced. “He says we’re leaving in fifteen.” I docked five minutes because I knew Dani would run late. “Let’s shake ass, team.”
We hadn’t had snowfall for twenty-four hours, and on the drive over, the countryside looked as pristine as a Christmas card. The hotel, though, was even more spectacular. This was where I was supposed to have my wedding, and I found I had to suck in a deep breath of bravery to smother the assault on my emotions. Not that I was disappointed my marriage to Rex wasn’t going ahead. I was relieved I’d been saved from a future of heartache.
So what was it I felt? Failure. Anger. Humiliation. A sense of loss. Relief. Rawness at having given so much of myself only to have it discarded. If my friends weren’t here all of these things would have combined into something unbearable. I took another breath, deep and visibly noticeable to Hunter who glanced my way.
“You okay?” he asked in a soft voice that slipped beneath the noisy chatter and exclamations coming from my two friends in the rear of the SUV.
“Sure. I’m good.” I was. I was okay because even though Hunter was distracted by something troubling him at his work, he’d noticed my discomfort and had taken the time to inquire. That was the sort of thing that grew a list that marked off the differences between Hunter and Rex.
He pulled into the drive-through portico of the hotel and a concierge appeared instantly. There was a flurry of activity as we were welcomed and the girls’ luggage was whisked away. A smartly dressed woman with a perfect smile introduced herself as Sally. With the efficiency of someone who probably could herd cats she corralled us towards the main doors to sweep us off for our day of pampering. At the entrance I told the others to go on inside and that I’d catch up.
I ran back to the vehicle, which Hunter had parked off to one side of the driveway. Through the window I saw his head bowed as he spoke on the phone. I knocked on the window and he held up a finger to indicate he needed a moment.
With my hands thrust into my pockets, I shuffled my feet like a kid needing the bathroom. I wasn’t cold, but I did want to be back in the vehicle with him. Finally, he dropped the phone into the center console and reached across to pop open the passenger door. I crossed behind the vehicle and hopped in. It was my turn to ask if he was okay because the look on his face suggested something very different. Hunter wasn’t looking at me and when I followed his gaze I realized he was focused on a man sitting in a car not far from us in the parking lot.
“Who is he?” I asked.
“Nobody for you to be concerned about. I’m heading to New York to meet up with Matt. There are a couple of meetings I’m needed at, so why don’t you stay here with the girls tonight? I’m not sure when I’ll be back.”
“What’s going on, Hunter?”
“Work.”
The way he blocked me was frustrating. “Will you and Matt be here for my ceremony?” I asked, kicking myself for sounding like the whiny girlfriend. I wasn’t whiny, and I wasn’t his girlfriend, so I was completely out of tune. My sologamy ceremony felt increasingly stupid at a moment like this, out of context, when I stared it in the face. It wasn’t the sort of thing the guys would understand. That aside, it would mean a lot to me for them to be here to share Christmas with us, and for moral support.
“As soon as we get this little issue sorted I’ll let you know our plans.”
“I can’t stay here, Hunter. I don’t have a change of clothes, or a toothbrush.”