She rose to leave before, driven by a compulsion beyond reason, she hesitated. Cautiously, as though attempting the forbidden, she leaned down to kiss James’s forehead. From deep within, love long repressed and denied seeped up, bringing tears to her eyes.
He murmured and stirred, and she drew back. ‘Goodbye, my dear son,’ she mouthed silently, then picked up the portmanteau, and slipped out of the room.
* * *
Down in the darkened kitchen, Alastair paced, hoping his mother’s warning had not brought him here too late. He’d checked Diana’s bedchamber immediately and found it empty; he’d wait here by the hearth a few more minutes, but if Diana did not appear, he would set out after her. On foot, in the dark, she couldn’t proceed with much speed, but though the home woods should not pose too many dangers for someone who kept to the road, he couldn’t be easy about her being out there alone, undefended, in the middle of the night.
He exhaled an impatient breath, aggravated at her headstrong decision to confront Graveston without him. Not that he’d been truly shocked when his mother rushed to tell him what Diana intended. After years of being forced to rely on no one but herself, he had suspected that once her son was safe, she might set off independently.
Determined to confront her enemy alone, to spare him and his family.
Damn Graveston! He spat out a few well-chosen oaths. And foolish girl! When would he convince her that she no longer had to fight her battles unaided?
A few minutes later, he heard the soft shuffle of slippers on the stairway. Drawing back into the shadows, he watched as, carrying a small trunk, Diana appeared in the moonlit room.
‘Just where do you think you are going?’ he demanded, unable to keep a note of exasperation from his voice.
‘Alastair!’ she gasped, whirling to face him.
‘Not the headless horseman. Though you deserve to confront a bogeyman, sneaking out like an ill-chosen guest absconding with the hostess’s jewels.’ His tone softening, he said, ‘How could you think I would let you go off to face Graveston alone?’
In the stillness, he heard a little sigh that twisted his heart. ‘I thought after I was gone, when you thought carefully about it, you would realise that was the best course. But how did you know I was leaving?’
‘Mama told me. Quite in a rush she was, urging me to hurry so I could intercept you before you escaped.’
‘Your mother?’ she echoed, clearly astounded.
‘Yes, though her warning didn’t take me completely by surprise. I remember an account of a girl, freed of her obligations, sneaking out through the kitchens in the dead of night. I just hadn’t anticipated it happening this soon.’
‘I can’t imagine why she would warn you,’ Diana murmured.
‘Here, give me that,’ he said, taking the portmanteau from her slackened grip. ‘Come up to the library and we’ll discuss it.’
Realising how peremptory he sounded, and remembering how often she’d been coerced, he added in a softer tone, ‘Please, Diana? I promise I will not force you to take any action with which you disagree. But let’s discuss this again before you throw yourself headlong into danger.’
‘Very well,’ she said in a little voice, sounding tired and discouraged.
Heartened, he took her elbow and guided her from the room. Not that his assistance was really needed, but after envisaging Graveston dragging her before a magistrate, Graveston hurling accusations against her at the assizes...Graveston striking her, he needed the reassuring feel of her warm flesh under his fingers.
Once in the library, he rummaged up some wine and waved her into a chair.
‘I still don’t understand why your mother didn’t just let me go. I would have thought she’d be relieved to be shed of me.’
‘She hasn’t quite forgiven you yet for what happened; the tale is a bit much to swallow all at once. But she believed enough of it to warn me—which is enough for now.’
He handed her a glass, noting how her fingers trembled as she sipped from it. He stemmed an overwhelming urge to gather her in his arms, to let his warmth and proximity reinforce the message she seemed so reluctant to believe—that he would stand by her, no matter the outcome. But she still radiated a brittle fragility, seeming half-glad he’d intervened, half-angry that he’d circumvented her will. He wouldn’t risk pushing her too hard.
‘I thought we’d agreed to face Graveston together,’ he said instead. ‘I thought you were going to trust me.’
‘And I thought you understood I would rather die than destroy your happiness and reputation a second time.’
‘Ah, Diana, do you truly think I could be happy, knowing you were going to sacrifice yourself for me? Perhaps if I tell you in more detail what I plan, I can convince you that proceeding together is the better way. You remember my cousin Will?’
He shrugged. ‘I have thought about it. No one would believe ill of Mama, who made her choice to support us when she alerted me to stop you. Jane and Lissa are both married into important families with husbands who can protect them. Try as he might, Blankford would never find enough evidence to convict you in a court of law, so creating a scandal is all he could ultimately achieve. We can face it down together. Besides, neither of us cares a fig about whether we’re received in Society or not.’
‘You might become “Infamous Alastair” in truth,’ she said with a flicker of a smile.
‘And never look back. But I really don’t think it will come to that. Won’t you try this my way?’
He hesitated, wanting to say so much more. That neither honour nor affection would permit him to let her sacrifice herself a second time. That logic and reason demanded she choose his alternative. That he intended to keep her here and implement his plan whether she agreed or not.
But after all she had suffered, any attempt to coerce would probably trigger an instinctive resistance that would make her deaf to logic or reason. Holding her by force would only result in her trying to slip through his grasp again at the first opportunity.