As I strolled to my car, I couldn’t help the pang that racked my chest at what I was leaving behind, the loss of an old friend, a love that never got to flourish, and the chance at something new, someone that sparked a new excitement for life in me. I pulled open the car door but before I could climb in, Spade’s voice stopped me.
“Iwillbe seeing you.” The determination that hardened his voice drew my attention back to him, sparking an ember of hope that I could have it all. The singer’s limp form was tossed over his shoulder now, and he gave me a wry smile and winked before he turned, sauntering to the back of the building with a spring in his step. I idly realized there wasn’t a crest on the back of his jacket like the others, and my lips quirked to the side, my curiosity mounting.
Sliding into my car, I turned the ignition, the purr of the engine rumbling under me. My mind was still with the mysterious Spade, imagining what could’ve happened if I did see him again as I pulled out of the parking lot.
Chapter eight
Giana
Now
Eachmilebacktothe house felt like another weight slipping back onto my shoulders. My mind was still a rollercoaster of emotions from the bar, and meeting Spade felt as though it was a dream. I bit the corner of my lip, needing that sharp pain to prove this was reality and I hadn’t dreamed up the whole thing. Glancing at the clock, I couldn’t believe that all happened in one night.
The strength I found from wrestling back that moment of control over my life slipped away with each second that ticked by. I tried to grasp onto that feeling, to clasp it close to my heart to steel myself against dealing with whatever fallout awaited me. Despite the risk I took tonight, I really didn’t have much to show for it. Sure, tasing that piece of shit singer had allowed me to reclaim a part of me that had been broken for some time now, beaten down for years of being treated like I was less than a person, controlled like a puppet with threats and violence. I wished I could have gone with Spade and helped him carve into that man … the thought shocks me from my daze as though a drape had been pulled back, illuminating the dark thoughts. I’d never been one to revel in causing pain, but I couldn’t shake how I felt tonight—like I took the first breath of fresh air I had in a very long time.
My run-in with Merrick seemed so long ago now, and the way he spoke my name just before I left still haunted me. His tone had been so much like the old Merrick, the one who was always there for me, who taught me how to ride a bike, how to drive, how to fight, and how to shoot a gun … The confidence I had just a few minutes ago was whittled down as I pulled up to the house. But I held on to what little power remained, tucking it away like my own little secret.
I pressed the remote as I neared the wrought-iron gates and they rattled open for me. I couldn’t help but picture them as gates to a cell, my life with Tommaso suffocating the last of my freedom. Glancing around the driveway, I sighed a breath of relief at the empty spot where he usually parked his car. Hopefully he wouldn’t notice the dust clinging to the side of the car before I had a chance to wash it off tomorrow. Although he’d know I left, I wouldn’t be able to use the excuse of going out for dinner if he did. All of the restaurants were situated in the downtown area, one of the “safest” places to be according to his family. Hell, even my parents’ diner didn’t have that much dirt and debris despite the disrepair it had fallen into over the years.
Closing the car door quietly, I walked to the front entrance, my chest tightening with each step I took. Worry clouded my mind despite his car not being in the driveway.He had other cars in the garage, I reminded myself. There wouldn’t be any room to park in there. But I couldn’t seem to shake off the feeling of unease that creeped over me. There didn’t seem to be any lights inside the house from first glance, so I eased the front door open, a high-pitched squeal setting my teeth on edge.
Shutting the door softly, I glanced around the dark entrance way, scanning the sitting room and into the kitchen. Only the faint hum of the appliance lights illuminated the kitchen. The tension in my chest eased at that and I turned to the light switch by the door, some of my earlier giddiness resurfacing.
Slipping my phone from my bag, I glanced down to check my messages and stepped into the sitting room. Sophia’s name had me pausing.
Sophia:You need to tell me what your plan is, otherwise, I’m coming there myself.
I read it and hurriedly deleted it, not wanting any evidence of our conversation from the car. If Tommaso read that he’d have men at her apartment within the hour. I took another step forward, so engrossed with my phone the crash of glass beside me startled a scream from my lips. The phone dropped from my hands, and I scrambled to the side, putting as much distance between me and whoever made that noise.
I frantically scanned the area again, freezing when my eyes locked on a pair of mahogany ones that haunted my every waking moment and every nightmare. Red splotches dotted his face and neck, and his chest heaved almost uncontrollably. My breath caught in my throat at the rage rolling off him, the massive room shrinking in on itself as panic clouded my mind.
His fingers gouged into the arms of the chair he sat in, the indentations so deep I wouldn’t be surprised if he punctured the fabric somehow. I glanced at the wall needing to see what happened in case there was another threat. Liquid rolled down the wallpaper only inches from where my head had been a few moments earlier, and a crystal tumbler laid in shards scattered across the hardwood floor. The warm scent of whiskey invaded my nostrils and I fought against the wince, knowing this wouldn’t be good. Tommaso was bad enough on a regular day if he was upset, but who knew how long he’d been sitting there sipping on his whiskey and preparing for me to walk through that door. Who knew how many ways he came up with to punish me as he’d waited.
“Where have you been?” he growled out between gritted teeth, the sound so animalistic, I almost stumbled back. But I forced my feet to stay planted where they were, even though every fiber of my being begged for me to run.
“I went out for dinner,” I hedged, attempting my excuse, but judging by the state he was in, there wasn’t any answer I could give that would appease him.
“Dressed like that?” he sneered, his lips curling in disgust as he scanned me.
“This isn’t New York, Tommaso. I would look out of place if I wore a designer dress to a local pub,” I sighed, still clinging onto some shred of hope I’d convinced him my story was true. I just couldn’t back down, I couldn’t let him see any glimmer of fear. It was easier after tonight, after having that man convulsing on the ground because of me. I had the power to do that. And if I got the chance, I’d do worse to the Barones.
“You look like a cheap whore,” he barked, bolting up from his chair to stalk over to me. My jaw clenched at the insult, but I kept my chin high, refusing to back away regardless of the menacing set of his shoulders or his clenched fists tensed at his side. I could handle anything he threw at me.This is only temporary. I would be out of here soon after I found a job—just a few months.
“I’m wearing jeans and a blouse Tommaso.” Biting back the retort I wanted to fling at him, I remained as calm as possible. I couldn’t let him get me worked up, otherwise we would just keep pushing each other until one of us snapped, like last time. My mind went to the taser tucked into my purse. It would be so easy to slide it out and do the same thing I did to the piece of shit singer. But this—this would have consequences, ones I wasn’t ready to deal with yet.
“Your breasts are almost all the way out, Giana,” he spat, closing the final few feet between us. I took in just how disheveled he looked before I forced myself to look up at him.
He was usually so put together in a full suit, but his jacket was tossed over the back of his chair, and the long sleeves of his shirt were rolled up to his elbows. His signature red tie was nowhere to be found, his shirt half unbuttoned, and this close it looked like he’d ripped half of the buttons clear off.
“Do you do this just to test me, mi amore? Do you really think I won’t slaughter whoever you met?” He pressed his chest against mine, his warm skin burning against my own.
“I d-didn’t meet with anyone,” I stammered, swallowing thickly. I thought he’d assume I was trying to escape again, not that I was meeting with a man behind his back.
Dread pooled in my gut as I remembered the last time he’d assumed I was with another man. He’d moved from threats to violence after the last time his jealous rage had gripped him when he’d met me at my gym and caught my fitness instructor flirting with me. Before I could even get a word out, Tommaso’s men had dragged Ryan into the alley and had swiftly bashed his right leg with a tire iron until an unmistakable crack echoed around us, audible even over the ear-piercing screams they’d tried to muffle with a hand clasped over his lips. I’d been powerless to do anything to stop them, as Tommaso had held me against him, his hand covering my own mouth as he whispered in my ear that it was my fault and they’d kill him if I moved a muscle. It was later that night that he’d lifted his hand but came to his senses just in time with his knuckles poised mere inches from my face. That was what made me plan for my escape, because that would’ve been the first step down that dark and dangerous road. The abuse would only worsen from there.
His palms ran up my arms and he inhaled deeply, his eyes closing as though touching me helped to calm him. Well as long as my arms were the only thing he wanted to touch that would be fine with me. I may have indulged in the physical aspect with Tommaso before, but after seeing Merrick and meeting Spade, I couldn’t stomach being touched intimately by this man despite all the years we’d spent together. His need for me was toxic, it had always been toxic. It was like I was a drug he couldn’t refuse and for a while he was mine too. He made himself the only thing in my world and although I never loved him, I couldn’t deny there had been passion between us.
“Oh, then you won’t mind if I check the GPS on your car, would you?” he asked, a smug smile stretching across his face as his eyes drifted open. The last of my hope came crashing down around me, laying on the floor like the shards from crystal glass he’d thrown. My pulse pounded in my ears, drowning out all the background noise.