“I love—”
“No, before that.”
Olivia looks confused. “Um. You take care of me when I need you to?”
And then it slams into me like a ton of bricks. Last year, my siblings, Grant, and I were at the cemetery for the anniversary of my parents’ funerals. When we were about to leave, I asked my sister, “Are you sure, Luce?” And she replied, “Yes, I’m fine, and he’ll take care of me if I need him to.” I suddenly feel very grateful for Grant. If he does for Lucy like I apparently do for Olivia, then I’m glad he’s with her. I’m glad she has someone who would do anything for her as well.
“Corey?”
“Yeah?” I blink and focus on Olivia.
“What are you thinking about?”
“Lucy said the same thing about Grant last year.”
“Hmph.”
“What?” I ask.
“I thought you would be more excited that I said it back.” There’s a teasing tone in her voice that makes me smile.
“Oh, I’m excited. I’m so excited that I’m going to bed and you’re coming with me.”
“What if I don’t want to?” she teases as she stands, holding her hand out so she can lead me to my room.
I’VE BEEN UP for a few hours, unable to sleep since I woke up around three this morning. Today is not a good day. Olivia’s arm slips around my waist as she scoots her naked body closer to my back, which is facing her. I put on a pair of pajama pants when I got up for a glass of water earlier. I interlock our hands to let her know I’m awake.
“Why do you have a pillow over your head, Corey?”
“Thought it might help me fall back to sleep.” My voice is muffled from underneath the pillow, but she hears me. I hate that I feel this way, especially after last night. Even more so, I hate the words that come out of my mouth next. “Can you go home? I don’t want to deal with life today.”
She’s quiet for a moment. “That bad?”
“Mhm.”
“I know sometimes during times like this, you don’t want me around,” and I hate there’s a part of me that doesn’t, “but do I have to go? I can lie here with you and be quiet.”
Rolling over to face her, I ask, “Do you really want to spend a Saturday like that?”
“For you, yes. If it’s that bad, don’t make me leave, Corey.” There’s a hint of desperation in her voice.
“Okay.”
She gets up to use the restroom and dresses when she returns before crawling back into bed with me. I wrap my arms around her waist, burying my face in the crook of her neck as she lays an arm over me. And we lie there in silence. My forehead is pressed against her neck. Breathing in her scent calms and soothes me, making the world a little more bearable.
Her stomach grumbles after an hour or so, but she doesn’t leave.
“Go eat, Olivia.”
“Do you want something?”
“No.” I’m not hungry at all. Probably won’t be until dinner time.
She sighs. Begrudgingly, she heads to the kitchen without me. About fifteen minutes later, she returns and we resume our positions. I should have known Olivia couldn’t keep her end of the bargain and be quiet. I give her props that it takes her almost three hours, though. “What are you thinking about?” That’s her question.
“Nothing,” I reply. “No talking.”
“Nothing? Like nothing at all? How is that possible?” She ignores me, being entirely too curious.