She placed her hand on his forearm.
He had no business worrying her. He knew about her cancer. He was the only one of his brothers who did. And yet, always a pillar for everyone to lean on, he needed his momma for once. Toby reached out to take Stevie’s car seat and diaper bag. His mom scooped Seth into her arms to nuzzle his silky hair, relishing the four-year-old’s sigh as he settled into a new position.
He dared a glance at his pops. Harold’s eyes were as unyielding as they’d always been.
He jammed his hands in his pockets, his T and loose plaid, yesterday’s mess since he hadn’t changed after signing the paperwork and dropping it at FedEx, hanging untucked upon his belt buckle. Any more silence, and he might start scuffing his boots. He was a Harvard-educated lawyer for Christ’s sake, taller than his dad now, yet he still felt so damn small in Harold’s shadow.
He gritted his teeth and stepped into the house. He was the firstborn, the responsible one, and ought to act like it. The one who excelled, always chasing that approval. Football captain. Debate captain. Straight As. Eagle Scout. Be an example. Your little brothers look up to you. You’re the oldest son. Protect them. Achieve. Man up.
“She fucked you over, didn’t she?” Toby spoke, since no one else would.
“Mouth, Tobe, I swear,” Pops grumbled, ironically swearing under his breath.
And their dad wondered where his offspring got their foul mouths from…
But Pops’s eyes snaked back to Tyler, waiting for him to fess up to why he was on the family’s doorstep with an angry sheen coating his face.
“Oh, honey,” his momma murmured. Her grip on his arm tightened.
He twisted his brow. Chewed that cheek, fighting to keep the knot in his chest from spilling out his mouth. His momma passed Seth off to Toby. Toby, for all his rebellious ways, was an amazing uncle, and cradled his nephew to his chest. Tyler’s eyes misted at the sight. This grief, it wasn’t for himself—he was damned relieved Izzy was good and gone. This grief was for his boys.
“Couldn’t you work it out?” Pops asked. “Separation ain’t the answer.”
“Harold,” his momma chastised.
“Screw that.” Toby growled. “She left her kids. She doesn’t give a f—”
“Language.” Both his parents cut Toby off.
“Whatever,” Toby continued, his voice razor sharp despite his gentle hold on Seth. “It takes two to make it work. Ty can’t do the work for both of ’em. He’s bled himself dry, Dad. He married her, just like you wanted, and look what she gone and did. Why the hell can’t you leave Ty alone for once?”
“She divorcing you?” Harold rumbled as if he hadn’t heard Toby, more likely, hadn’t given Toby’s uncharacteristic wisdom credence.
His momma’s grip nearly stung now, which only made his muscles prickle.
“She’s gone,” Tyler bit out. “Momma, I just—” His words caught in his thickened throat. He swallowed, trying to wash down the damned lump. “Just needed to see you—”
“You didn’t try to stop her?” Harold interjected. “How long she gone for this time?”
Deborah frowned. “For Pete’s sake, Harold—”
“For once, you think you could have my back?” he snapped, Pops’s eyes widening. “Just once? I’ve done almost everything you’ve ever asked of me. She ain’t coming back this time. Papers are signed. She never wanted kids, sure as hell don’t want the farm, and she never wanted me. She signed ’em over to me. She’s been fucking another guy for a year now on her photo shoots in Paris. How do you think that makes me feel?” he snarled. “For once, you think you could quit making me feel like I don’t measure up? Goddammit! Or are you just gonna stare me down and say I told you so—”
His momma dragged him into an embrace, cutting off his venom. Seth stirred from his outburst. Anger brimmed so hotly, he was finally ready to explode. A smug grin spread on Toby’s face at him finally standing up for himself. Hell, he stood up for himself on the regular, just never had been able to cross that line with Pops before.
“Shhh.” His momma rubbed his back. “It’s gonna be okay, my loyal, hardworking boy.”
“How am I gonna do this on my own?” he bit out.
“You already have been,” Toby smirked.
“And doin’ a fine job,” Momma said against his ear. “You protect everything and everyone. Me, the farm, these babies, but who’s been there to protect you?”
No one. He’d had to man up so much he didn’t know how to just be a man. While Toby dicked around, Tyler was there to get his bro in line. When Travis had gone off to Afghanistan and nearly gotten killed, Tyler had helped his parents find him and bring him home. When Izzy had shown up at his dorm room with a positive pregnancy test, he’d manned up. When his grandparents had died, he’d acquired the farm.
He sagged into his momma’s hold.
“You gave it your all,” she whispered.