Chapter Nineteen
Rose’s crew milled through the kitchen, loading up their plates with the catered fajitas. An afternoon resting and a trip to get showers had restored their happy nature. Rose listened to their excited chatter, the only plain face being that of Howie, who had grudgingly refused to eat anything. In fact, ever since Rose had refused to go into town with him, Howie had stopped talking to her, eying her when she didn’t expect it and making her uncomfortable.
“It’s sooo good, Howie. You should grab some!” Kelsey chirped from across the kitchen, loading her mouth as beans and peppers plopped out the end of her tortilla onto her paper plate cupped beneath it.
“Not hungry,” he grumbled from one of the stools. “I think I’m going to inventory some of the artifacts from today and chill. I’m beat.”
“No need,” Rose smiled, scooping a pile of bell peppers out of the foil tray onto her pile of chicken. She set down the plate to wrap up her fajita and lick the seasoning from her finger. “I got all twelve of them entered in the database this afternoon.”
“It’s starting!” called Hunter, falling onto the couch while aiming the remote, and the telltale music of the movie introduction chimed through the sweet surround sound Toby had installed throughout the room.
There was a general stampede to the other room. Rose turned to brace her rear against the island, holding her plate under her mouth and tearing off a bite, viewing the flat screen from where she stood. Not looking at Howie, who she sensed was scowling at her. Juanita’s food was the real deal and always reminded her of her mother’s cooking. Wistful memories of eating together as a family when she’d been a little girl invaded her thoughts, but she closed her eyes and banished them. You had a good life, her conscience chastised her. You didn’t grow up impoverished, even if Pa wasn’t a millionaire. Your mom kept in touch with you. Everyone’s upbringing is different. There is no “normal” family.
She’d told herself that mantra many times, but losing her mom had scarred her in ways she could never visit upon Sage, no matter how tough the going got as a single mom.
Howard still sat on a stool at the counter, a look of brooding on his face. She glanced at him, feeling the need to brace herself. His hackles seemed raised, causing a shiver to race down her neck, as if he had something to say since holding his peace after his confrontation with Toby.
“You have something on your mind?” Rose asked, taking another bite and chewing.
Howard shook his head, then backtracked. “Yeah actually. What’s going on with you and Mister ‘Dickson’?”
This time, he’d said the name using mocking quote marks with his fingers, too.
“None of your business, but if you must know, he had some interesting information to show me about future research. If this project is renewed for another year, I think everyone is going to be pleased—”
Howard pushed to his feet, then walked to her. She stood upright, pushing away from the counter in a sudden feeling of self-defense.
“You have to know I wish we were still together. And every time I see that redneck flash his eyes at you, I want to shake you. Can’t you see what he’s doing? Guys like him don’t give a crap about anyone but themselves, and all you are to him is the latest novelty. I want…” He looked away, chewed his lip. “I want you to give me another chance.”
She gaped at him. He couldn’t be serious. Her mouth slammed shut. Feeling her lips purse primly, she swiped a paper napkin from the nearby stack and wiped the fajita residue from the corner of her mouth.
“I’m not going to rehash everything that happened, Howie. We have different values, different goals for a relationship.”
“And you think Toby Dixon shares your values?”
“I’m not interested in you any longer,” she continued, determined not to let the doubt Howie was casting on her fragile trust in Toby niggle its way into her thoughts. “You need to let it go. My business with any other man is none of your business, whether we’re friends or involved—”
“So you admit you’re involved,” he hissed, his brows pinching angrily in the middle.
“What business would it be of yours if it were true?”
It was so true, even if it was still up in the air as to what extent. Toby’d indicated for the first time today that he wanted her to come back when field school was done, that he wanted to share something more with her. Was sharing the sun god site with her a metaphor for sharing himself with her?
Howie ran his fingers across his head, smoothing his dreads, huffed, rested his hands at his waist. “I want a second chance. I want to apologize for the kind of guy I used to be. But I feel like you’re purposefully ignoring me.”
More shock. Toby’d spotted just how deeply Howie’s interest ran from the moment they’d met, which had fine-tuned her radar. But as handsome as she’d always found Howie, good looks and a tarnished history together weren’t the foundation upon which any trust could ever be built. His efforts these past couple years had been in vain. Why couldn’t he see that? Cheat on her once and it was the only chance a man would get.
“It’s been three years.”
“And?” He quirked an eyebrow.
“And you just think I’ll magically want you again?”
“Look at us. We’ve known each other for years. We work alongside each other. We have a ton in common.”
“We don’t. Howie, I need this to stop. We have archaeology in common. But nothing else. I’ll never forget what it looked like, walking into your apartment, seeing you naked on top of—of…her. Watching you scramble for your clothes and start begging me to stay and hear you out.” Howie was shaking his head angrily, but she didn’t let him get a word in edgewise as she lowered her voice further. “You knew it was wrong. You knew I’d be hurt. And you didn’t have the decency from the moment we went on our first date to tell me you would never be exclusive—”
“I didn’t want you to dump me. But I’m not like that now. I’ve changed,” Howard growled, trying to touch her.