“I understand that,” she murmured. “I think the biggest thing that bothers you about this whole vision thing is the fact that it doesn’t appear you have any control over these messages.”
He nodded. “Exactly, and who the hell needs that?”
She smiled, gently stroked his fingers, and spoke. “You’ve come a long way.”
He stared at her, fascinated. “How can you say that?”
“Because I remember when you walked into the police station, all those months ago,” she began. “I know you were angry and frustrated, but you were also scared back then, about the kids.”
He nodded. “It’s the only reason I went to the cops.”
“And I get that,” she noted. “I know it took a lot out of you, and I really appreciate the fact that you made that first step.”
He snorted. “You’re thankful now. You weren’t so happy at the time.”
She grinned at him.
“But that’s true enough. You’re right, and I get it. I mean, I wouldn’t have normally done it, but it was a step that needed to happen for those kids.”
“And because of it,” she noted, “you know things are definitely moving along.”
“Maybe,” he replied, “but not enough.”
“Meaning that you still don’t have control when you think you should have?”
“Yeah. Don’t you think I should have some control?” he asked in a challenging voice. “I look like a complete idiot when this shit hits me in the middle of the street or when I’m out on a job. If you’re me, a little control would go a long way.”
“I don’t know because I don’t know how much control one can have over these psychic images,” she admitted. “So, it’s like a sliding scale, with no ends.”
He stared at her for a moment and then slowly nodded. “I think that’s the thing I’m judging it by, the reality of what our current world is,” he explained, “but I don’t know if it’s appropriate to even look at it that way.”
“I wouldn’t imagine so,” she stated, “because nothing about what you’re doing is normal. So, you can’t judge it by the normal scale. And, of course, judging isn’t the easiest or best way, but, even if you measure it by a normal scale, I can’t imagine that’ll work very well.”
“Then how do I measure whether I’m doing okay or not?”
“Well, by what you were doing today,” she stated simply. “Don’t use anybody else’s yardstick. Just go by your own improvements on a day-to-day basis. And the fact that you could do what you did today, that sounds like—to me—that you have made huge progress.”
He sat back, looked at her in surprise. “You know something? I think you’re right.”
She frowned. “What do you mean, youthinkI’m right?” she said in a teasing voice. “Of course I’m right. I’m always right.”
At that, he burst out laughing. “Well, I don’t know about that,” he replied, a big grin on his face.
“At least we don’t compete over it,” she noted. “People who have told me things about these two dead joggers and their relationships just blows me away. Everybody seems to have been aware of the two bitchy women, but nobody could do anything to change them because they weren’t inside the relationship. They were all on the outside, watching, just shaking their heads.”
“I would think you would too, wouldn’t you?” he asked curiously.
“It’s not something anyone else can really stop, is it? I mean, how would those two women have taken it if somebody were to interfere? If they were that aggressive with their husbands, who would want to interfere? It sounds like the two women were justas bad competing between the two of them as well, and it wasn’t just over running.”
He nodded. “I get it, and there’s no peace in that kind of relationship, if you’re always trying to one-up each other. That’s not a nice way to live. So, I wonder if the marital relationships were competitive in that way too.”
Kate shrugged. “Unless they just saved it for the friendship. And how long can a friendship like that have lasted?” she murmured.
He looked at her. “You know what? That’s a really good question because you mentioned how they had been running for like five years together? Yet I can’t imagine their relationship lasting that long. Pretty soon somebody will have won too often, or one of them would have assumed somebody cheated, and all that friendship would dissolve almost instantly.”
She frowned at that. “You would certainly think so. If the relationship’s not competitive and if they both have to win even though there can only ever be but one winner, surely trouble comes eventually.”
“Exactly,” he stated. “I highly suspect the friendship could even have been already starting to turn.”