“Look. A bit of a view too,” he said, pointing to the front, which looked out over Locarno Beach.
“Which is lovely,” she murmured.
“Thinking about your own retirement?” he said jokingly.
She rolled her eyes at him. “My mother is in a home already,” she said.
“We could always transfer her here,” he said in serious tone.
“No, she won’t be doing anything with me,” she snapped.
“Ouch, ugly childhood.”
She looked at him and said, “I’m sure you know my history.”
He flushed. “Oh God, I’m sorry. I forgot.”
“It is what it is,” she said.
“Must have been really tough,” he said. “I can’t even imagine what it would have been like.”
“Most people can’t,” she said, “and, to a certain extent, that’s totally okay. What makes it tough is when it keeps coming back and hitting you every once in a while, and you don’t realize just what the impact is.”
“You don’t get along with her?”
“She still blames me,” she said briefly.
He looked at her in surprise.
She shrugged. “It’s easier if you can blame somebody else instead of yourself, right?”
“I suppose. But how old were you?” he asked.
“Seven,” she said quietly, knowing full well that nobody in this world would believe a seven-year-old except for the parent. But not hers.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I mean, not only did you lose your brother, it sounds like you also lost your mother at the same time.”
She cocked her head, as they walked up the front steps. “It’s not a bad way of looking at it,” she murmured. “I didn’t really put the words that way in my head, but it’s not bad.”
“How could anybody blame you at that age?” he asked, shaking his head. “That just doesn’t make sense.”
“Like I said, it’s much easier to blame somebody else.”
He nodded. “And it’s still an open case, isn’t it?”
“Well, if you mean in the sense that he’s never been found, yes,” she said. “Open in that it was never solved. But is anybody looking at it besides me? I doubt it. There’s not been any news. There hasn’t been anything to move forward with. So, in other words, nothing for anybody to go on. But still, every time I hear that a body has turned up for a child gone missing,” she said, “it just brings it all back up.”
“Which is why the last case would have really gotten to you,” he said, nodding. “I’m sorry. We didn’t realize how tough it would have been for you.”
“It was a long time ago,” she said.
“Maybe so, but I’m sure dealing with that pedophile ring didn’t help you.”
“No, and it didn’t help that one of the victims was named Timothy,” she said shortly. He looked at her sideways, and she nodded. “Yes, that was my brother’s name.”
“Talk about pushing some buttons.” He winced. “At the same time, we were pretty shitty to you, weren’t we?”
She shrugged. “I expected it. It’s over with now anyway.”