‘Apparently she also thinks we’re in denial.’
‘Right,’ she said weakly because she could barely breathe with the lust slamming through her, let alone speak.
‘Although I’m not any more.’
Celia swallowed and thought that, seeing as how Marcus was being brutally honest at the moment, what else could she do but return the courtesy? ‘I never have been,’ she murmured.
‘No?’
‘I’ve always been attracted to you. I haven’t wanted to be. It’s been driving me insane.’
His jaw tightened. His eyes darkened. He twined his fingers through hers and tugged her closer and her heart began to thump wildly.
‘So what do you suggest we do about it?’ he said softly, so close that he dazzled her. Scrambled her thoughts. Melted her brain. Rendered her all soft and mushy inside.
Nothing was one option. The sensible one probably and definitely the one that would cause her the least emotional upheaval.
But Celia had been sensible all her life and look where it had got her. She had a great career and pots of cash in the bank, but while her friends were tripping over themselves to rush up the aisle, as her father had so thoughtfully pointed out, she hadn’t had a boyfriend in years.
Which generally suited her fine. She didn’t want a serious relationship right now. With the prospect of partnership on the horizon she didn’t have the time or the energy needed to devote to one. Yet, this afternoon, for the first time in months, she’d been aware of how alone she was.
A medley of images now spun through the fog in her head: Dan and Zoe smiling adoringly at each other as they cut the cake; the look she’d caught Lily and Kit exchange during the speeches, a look that held love, acceptance, hope and such heat; all those couples swaying to the music.
And her. Standing alone moments before her father had sought her out, her chest squeezing with loneliness and envy.
The irony was that if it hadn’t been for Marcus’ stupid bravado her relationship history for the past fifteen years could have been very different. She might not have been so wary of men. She might not have been so suspicious of their motives. She might not have scared off anyone who showed more than a passing interest in her. She might even have eased up a bit on her career in order to have a relationship. A marriage. A family.
But what was the point of dwelling on that now? She couldn’t change the past. And she was happy with her life. Today’s stab of loneliness was nothing more than a blip. Tomorrow she’d be back in London, back at work, and she’d be fine.
She was glad she and Marcus had the opportunity to clear the air. It gave her some sort of closure. Maybe once the deal she was working on was out of the way she might be able to start a whole new chapter of her life romance-wise. Maybe she’d stop pushing men away. Maybe she’d find someone who was as driven as she was, who held the same values she did. Someone as sensible and level-headed as she was.
The problem was, right now, she wasn’t feeling in the slightest bit sensible or level-headed. She was feeling reckless. Wild. Weirdly out of control. Her body was behaving way beyond its remit. Emotions were churning through her and playing havoc with her common sense.
All because of Marcus, because she wanted him. God, she wanted him. Had for years, but had always thought it one-sided. Now, though, she knew it wasn’t, and she could feel the attraction burning between them, fierce, mutual and utterly irresistible.
It had been so long since she’d had sex. Even longer since she’d had good sex. And with the amount of practice he’d had he’d be very good at it, she was sure.
She was under no illusions about what he was. She might have been wrong about some things, but she knew he enjoyed playing the field. She knew he didn’t do commitment, didn’t do long-term, which suited her fine because she didn’t want either from him. She just wanted to explore this sizzling chemistry because for one thing it would undoubtedly give her proper closure and for another who was she to fight with such a force of nature?
Mind made up, Celia ignored the little voice inside her head telling her she was mad and dragged her gaze up from the expanse of his chest. She saw a muscle in his jaw begin to pound and his eyes darken, and desire flooded through her.
‘Well?’ he said, the tension radiating off him suggesting that he was finding it as hard to cling onto his self-control as she was.
‘You know those scruples of yours?’ she said, her voice weirdly low and husky.
‘What about them?’
‘Do they include anything concerning friends’ younger sisters now?’
‘Nope.’
‘Good,’ she said as fire licked through the blood in her veins and her heart thundered wildly. ‘Then how about we finish what we started?’
* * *
One quick tug was all it took and then Celia was flush against him, her eyes widening and her lips parting on a gasp, although what she thought she was surprised about Marcus had no idea.
What did she think would happen when she’d basically just told him she wanted to have sex with him? He might not have acknowledged it before but he’d been waiting for this for fifteen years. He wasn’t going to wait one more second. Couldn’t anyway, because the heat and want now flaring in the depths of her eyes, so different from the disdain and disapproval he was used to, were seducing him so completely that everything faded but her.