Her chest rises and falls with each breath that she takes. When she finally looks at me, she says, "If this makes you uncomfortable, I can go sleep somewhere on a couch. I'm sure you usually don't expect to be stuck with a woman in your own bed."
There's insecurity on her face. I put my arm around her and pull her closer to my side. I wrap a leg over her hip. "No, I want you to stay. Plus I grabbed a few condoms. I’m going to need you again tonight."
I hold my breath, hoping that she's not going to tell me no, hoping that she doesn't get out of this bed and walk away. But finally, her body softens against mine, and she pushes her lips to my chest. "That sounds good to me," she whispers.
Chapter11
Allison
I'm at that point where I know that it's morning, but I'm half conscious and I keep trying to fall back to sleep. I'm worn out, but I know I need to get up out of this bed. I stretch, and every muscle is sore, even muscles I didn't know that I had.
Kane is gone, and I try not to get caught up in wondering why he left before I was even awake. Flashbacks from last night replay in my head. I practically begged him to fuck me. I was demanding and completely uninhibited, and it was perfect. But today is a new day, and I have to remind myself that it was one night. I'll be going back to my own life soon and trying to figure out all of that. I know I need to make changes because there’s no way I want to live in that big house or go back to what my life used to be like.
I sit up in the bed and see myself in the mirror across the room. My hair is tousled, and even from here I can see the marks on my neck. I look like a completely different woman than the one that was staring back at me yesterday. Gone is the lifeless look in my eye, the overwhelming despair, and in its place is a woman that has felt protected and cherished for the first time.
I look down at my body, and the love marks are random places everywhere. Kane did not give me a break last night, and I didn't want him to. It was good. God, it was good. But probably the best part was being held in his arms. Being with him has me questioning my future and what I want it to look like. They’re heavy thoughts for first thing in the morning.
I move my legs to hang over the side of the bed and sit with my palms on the mattress beside me. My life is a mess. I can't go back to that house, not to live. I hated it when I was there before. I don't want any part of it now. I don't know why I'm getting my hopes all up for Kane. He is not going to want to mess with me anyway. I have way too much baggage, plus he's got his own shit going on.
I stand up and grab some clothes from the bag on the dresser. I shower quickly, change clothes, and try my best to look presentable. There's a small mark on my neck that peeks out of my shirt, but I don't even try to hide it. I’m not ashamed of what happened last night, but I know some people are not going to understand it.
When I walk out into the clubhouse, I take a seat at the first table that I come to. There's a few men that I met the night before hanging out at the far end of the room, and they all say hi to me.
Reaper, the one that I have found is a flirt, comes over to me. "You doing okay?"
"Yeah, I'm good."
"Give her a break," Kane says. I didn't even hear or see him come in. But he walks into the room, and Reaper just gives him a smirk and walks away. Kane sits down and sets a plate down in front of me. It's overfilled with eggs, bacon, and toast. He hands me a fork, and I take it.
“This is way too much for me,” I tell him.
He shrugs. He's quiet this morning, and I can see him searching my face, probably wondering if I'm going to freak out about last night.
"Thank you for the food," I tell him.
"You okay?" he asks.
I take a bite of the eggs and swallow them, then smile. "Do you know how many times you've asked me that since we've met?"
He shrugs and looks almost sad. I force a smile on my face. The awkwardness is here. "Yeah, I'm good."
He clears his throat. "About last night—" he starts.
My stomach drops at his solemn tone. He’s probably going to tell me that he regrets it or that it's no big deal, or that we shouldn’t have done what we did.
So I cut him off. “We don’t need to talk about it.”
He frowns and shakes his head. “We don’t?”
I keep eating, trying to avoid his gaze. “No, we don’t.”
He lifts his hand to run it through his hair. His eyes are glued to me, and I try to act like sitting this close to him is not having an effect on me. I know he’s waiting for me to continue, so I force myself to look at him. "There's nothing to talk about. We were two consenting adults that needed to let off steam. We had fun, right?"
Geez, I sound like an idiot. I just compared the earth-shattering orgasms he gave me last night to letting off steam. He has to think I’m crazy. He did things to me that I’ve never experienced. Hell, there’s no denying I loved it. Probably half his club heard how much I enjoyed it.
I take another bite of food and force my eyes away from him. He leans back in his chair, legs spread wide, and stares at me some more. Damn, he looks good, but it makes me wonder if I put my foot in it or something. Was I reading the situation wrong? Was he going to say something else? I could be honest with him and tell him that I'm scared at the feelings that he brought out of me, that last night was more than good. It was probably the best night that I've had in my life, that I've never felt closer to a man, and that I can see a future between us. But as I look at him from the side of my eye, I'm afraid that that would freak him out. I don't know what I have to lose at this point.
And just when I'm about to lay it all on the line and tell him everything, he nods his head. "Yeah. Right. It was fun."