Tears spill down her face and drip onto the robe she is wearing. She draws some shapes in the dirt that I can’t make sense of. When she points at them, I know she is trying to tell me something.
“I don’t know.” But I stare at them harder, hoping to understand. To remember because I’ve seen them before.
Her sobs shake her body.
I never wanted to make this trip in the first place, apparently.
Tail has given up.
Has she?
“What do you want to do, Julie?”
She buries her face in her hands, and her shoulders shake. I bite back on the curses that form. Then I stalk after Tail. He needs to help. We need to figure out what we are going to do. We need to find a way to communicate.
And I am a big, dumb beast, because I can’t think of anything.
21
Prey
My throat is rough and every word I want to say comes out as some kind of bark or yip or growl. And that’s not the only change. My nails are now claws.
I am a monster.
All the time I spend being good, doing the right thing and never starting a fight or arguing back. It doesn’t matter. Nothing matters. What is the point in going to the center, so I can ask to see the queen or whoever is in charge, when I can’t ask to go home? When I can’t even ask anyone for help?
All I had to do was help Bret, ask Michael to pull him out of the puddle or something, and then this wouldn’t have happened.
Don’t be a bitch.
Any time I disagreed that’s what he’d say, and I’d crumble, not wanting to open any cracks for Under to grab hold of. But I am full of cracks and no amount of smiling and doing as I’m told could hide them.
So instead, I watch as my monsters walk away and leave me sitting in the dirt.
I deserve it. Tail was right, I promised I wouldn’t give in. I wriggle my four remaining toes on my foot. He took the little one and already it has stopped bleeding.
At least wounds heal fast here. Once again, I try to find the positive. It seems better than giving in to the misery that wants to consume me.
I dry my eyes, aware that I am being watched. Tail and Michael are talking with enough distance between them that I don’t need to worry about them fighting.
“That was the deal, it’s ok.” I hear the words I’d written in the dirt like they are whispered in my ear.
I spin around and at first, I see nothing but a shape crouched behind me like some kind of extra shadow.
“I can read.” It moves closer. “I have been watching you and your friends. You are going to the center. I have been there.”
Am I hallucinating? Have I dreamed this whole thing and I’m still asleep on Michael’s back?
I erase my words and write new ones because even if I am dreaming maybe I will find an answer.Who are you?
“I used to be someone. You are Julie.”
A sad smile forms and I shake my head. I’m not her anymore.I am Prey.
Michael stomps back across the dirt toward me. His gaze narrows like he sees this new monster. The shadow swells and stands, and long shiny claws appear. That’s all he is, claws and darkness. I scramble between them and shake my head, though how I could stop a fight if they were intent on killing each other, I don’t know. Michael doesn’t understand me, but this new monster does.
I point at the scuffed words in the sand and hope that Michael will make sense of my mime.