When he realized Ryatt meant this as a serious question, Dennis replied, “I don’t know. I understand why we’re supposed to work at it, so that we learn to appreciate a little more,” he murmured, “but I don’t really understand what your problem is with that.”
“Well, the problem is,” he explained, “I just don’t understand how to get this the way I want it.”
“I think the whole point is,” Dennis added, “that you’re supposed to figure out your own heart and then go after what your heart wants.”
Ryatt smiled. “Now if only it were that easy.”
“I’m not sure it’snotthat easy,” Dennis countered. “It’s obvious the two of you have something going on.”
“And yet,” Ryatt murmured, “it feels like we don’t really get anywhere.”
“Depends where you’re wanting to go,” he murmured.
“I guess. We’re always talking around in circles.”
“And I’m sure you are because it seems like that’s just what people do instead of communicating and letting go of the fear of expressing themselves.”
“How did you know it was fear-based?” Ryatt asked, with a groan.
“It seems like everything’s about fear.”
“Yep, that sure is what I’m working on,” Ryatt shared. “Everything from being afraid that the program that I’m with will fail, and I’ll end up having to come back, just like my sister did. And that’s pretty hard to even contemplate. Add to that failing at a future career and having to start all over again, plus failing at this relationship and losing what’s important.”
“Of course your relationship is important,” Dennis said, “but why would you even consider that your PT program could fail?”
“It just seems like, if Quinton didn’t have to come back, it would seem like it was a success, but, because she did have to return, it feels like it’s not a success.”
“It sounds to me like you need to work on your definition of what is a success or what is a fail.”
“Yeah, you’re not the only one who has suggested that to me,” he murmured. “In my sister’s case, I just think that it would probably have been a lot easier for her to not need to come back.”
“And what? Let Quinton remain in pain and deteriorate further? No. You keep trying to get better. So you return to the program. Also, you have to consider that she and Stan wouldn’t have got together again.”
Ryatt stared at Dennis. “So do you think things like that are arranged by fate or destiny or whatever, just so that they get together?”
“That appeals to my romantic heart,” Dennis said, with a smile. “Do I understand how and what? No, I don’t, but what I do understand is that, when it’s right, it’s right. And you should know that in your heart. And, if it isn’t right, then you should also know that too.”
“It feels right,” Ryatt said hesitantly.
“Sure, but you haven’t got to the point ofsayingit is right. You’re still stuck on the I-think-it’s-right level.”
“Well, how do you know for sure?”
“The only thing that’s stopping you,” Dennis guessed, “is the fact that, in your mind, she hasn’t confirmed how she feels, and that’s the only reason that you’re unsure.”
“That’s quite true, although it would be a lot easier if she did confirm.”
“But have you asked her?”
“No, not yet,” Ryatt said. “I’m… We’ve talked around it many times. About, you know, the future and long-distance relationships and all that good stuff.” He gave Dennis a half smile. “But not getting to the heart of the matter.”
“And again that’s fear,” Dennis stated quietly. “And you don’t have to stay stuck at that level.”
“Are you sure?” Ryatt joked, with a twitch of his lips. “Seems like a nice safe place to be.”
“Sure, but, when you went into the military, that wasn’t a safe job. When you went out on assignment, where you had to rescue your team member, that wasn’t a safe trip. When you came here, and you took a chance on Quinton’s advice, that wasn’t a safe trip. Since when are you so stuck onsafethat you forget about the joys of taking a chance and following your heart?”
Ryatt stared at Dennis. “I hadn’t considered it that way.”